For 10 years, triathlete Henri Schoeman has received nasty, horrendous comments for winning a race. Words that you never want to receive. Words that I was surprised anyone would so freely cast at a stranger.
Here’s what happened: Schoeman and the race leader, Jonny Brownlee, were racing each other hard. Near the finishing line, Jonny collapsed from heat exhaustion. Schoeman went on to win the race. All was well, except what happened next.
In third place was Alistair Brownlee, Jonny’s elder brother. Out of brotherly love, Alistair supported his brother to the finishing line. This scene has gone viral countless times in the past decade. And each time, there was a flood of hateful comments thrown at Schoeman (and his family) for ignoring Jonny and finishing the race.
The Brownlee Brothers have been my favorite triathletes since I became a triathlete about 16 years ago. But I believe Schoeman did the right thing. They are professional racers whose careers and lives depend on them winning races. But perhaps more critically, the Brownlee Brothers love racing hard more than anything else. No true athlete wishes their competitors were weak so that they could win races. So, I’m sure the Brownlee Brothers appreciated the hard race and tough competition.
No one should receive the unjustified hate that Schoeman has been getting. As Confucius said, 己所不欲，勿施于人. Or simply, do not do to others what you would not want them to do to you. I don’t think anyone would want to be on the receiving end of those comments. For the sender, it might be a few impulse words, forgotten by the end of the day. But for the receiver, it becomes years of hurt and self-doubt.
Growing up, I saw similar bullying in school and how it affected the victims for many years, long after the bullies had forgotten what they had done. Admittedly, I didn’t have the courage to stop them, for fear that I would become a target.
I have also received some unkind comments from strangers before, and they have affected me for longer than I would like. It might be inevitable since I chose to have a public profile. But it doesn’t have to be like this.
Just like us, Schoeman is a father, a husband, and a son. We definitely wouldn’t want our children, partners, or parents to ever be in the same unfortunate situation he has been in.
The internet has made it possible for us to send messages to almost anyone we want. Let’s use it to spread the kindness we want to see in the world. Let’s not send messages that we would never say to someone’s face, just because we are behind our keyboards. Let’s model the right behavior for our children and guide them as they are growing up and learning about the internet and the world.
I don’t think Henri Schoeman has the capacity to read all the comments he received since he shared that video but, Henri, if you do…
Hey Henri! You have been a huge inspiration for me. Sorry if this comes across as rude, but you are one of the few athletes who have shown me that size doesn’t really matter in triathlon (I’m about the same height as you!) and you inspired me to keep training when I wanted to give up on the sport. The positive impact you are making on the world is much bigger than you can imagine. Thank you, and I hope you are keeping your head up!
