I also find myself constantly falling back to routines and going through the motions, but I also quickly get bored of them and try to automate them or find something new to work on.
As my mom put it aptly, I enjoy the process of understanding stuff and putting it together, but I would lose interest once I get a hold of them. Be it computer games, hobbies or jobs.
I guess it's a constant internal conflict between seeking patterns and stability vs seeking challenges and curiosity.
Yeah, I try to automate stuff if I can too. But I’m also referring to some mundane stuff that should not and cannot be automated (eg spending time with family) but that should be done with intentionally. I wrote a whole other essay on this haha https://letters.alfredlua.com/p/in-praise-of-the-daily-mundane
Thanks for sharing, Alfred! I resonate a lot with what you're going through - I feel very similar in some cases. If it's any help, these are 2 things that are working for me:
- When I put my daughter to bed, I also wish sometimes she just went to bed faster. Then she wants to read another book, or she wants to do all of the things that have somehow become part of the evening routine (I crawl and she rides on my back to the bedroom, she lies on top of me in bed and then I need to pretend I'm sleeping and then wake up uncontrollably by throwing her off of me haha, etc.). I try to indulge her when I feel like it, but sometimes I just don't. I don't think that makes me a bad parent - We all have our own needs/wants (and energy levels). As long as - like you said - I'm conscious about how I'm feeling and what I'm doing, I think it's okay.
- I'm shaking things up in my daily routine, to keep it interesting for myself. The one day I bring my kids to school carrying them (one with baby carrier and the other on the shoulders), the other day I cycle them to school, the next day I let my daughter ride her scooter etc.. Similarly for work: The one day I go to the office, the other day I work from home, the next day I work from a cafe. This keeps the rhythm going of getting the work done, but still allows myself some novelty :)
Thanks for reading my recap and leaving this comment, Michael!
1. When I read your comment or think about our night routine, I feel like “well, that’s not much. I/we should just indulge our kids.” But in the moment, I tend to overlook this haha.
2. Yeah, I also try to work at different places once in a while, especially when I want to think vs do or when I switch projects (design vs marketing). But sometimes, even this “variety” becomes a routine 🙃
Ah yes, regarding #2, some sort of rut will invariably creep in, I think. Sometimes I play with the thought: "What if I just could travel the world a bit more to liven things up?" But then i quickly realize that that also becomes tiring (and inefficient). So I guess constistency = boring!
Some thoughts on going through the mundane.
I also find myself constantly falling back to routines and going through the motions, but I also quickly get bored of them and try to automate them or find something new to work on.
As my mom put it aptly, I enjoy the process of understanding stuff and putting it together, but I would lose interest once I get a hold of them. Be it computer games, hobbies or jobs.
I guess it's a constant internal conflict between seeking patterns and stability vs seeking challenges and curiosity.
Yeah, I try to automate stuff if I can too. But I’m also referring to some mundane stuff that should not and cannot be automated (eg spending time with family) but that should be done with intentionally. I wrote a whole other essay on this haha https://letters.alfredlua.com/p/in-praise-of-the-daily-mundane
Thanks for sharing, Alfred! I resonate a lot with what you're going through - I feel very similar in some cases. If it's any help, these are 2 things that are working for me:
- When I put my daughter to bed, I also wish sometimes she just went to bed faster. Then she wants to read another book, or she wants to do all of the things that have somehow become part of the evening routine (I crawl and she rides on my back to the bedroom, she lies on top of me in bed and then I need to pretend I'm sleeping and then wake up uncontrollably by throwing her off of me haha, etc.). I try to indulge her when I feel like it, but sometimes I just don't. I don't think that makes me a bad parent - We all have our own needs/wants (and energy levels). As long as - like you said - I'm conscious about how I'm feeling and what I'm doing, I think it's okay.
- I'm shaking things up in my daily routine, to keep it interesting for myself. The one day I bring my kids to school carrying them (one with baby carrier and the other on the shoulders), the other day I cycle them to school, the next day I let my daughter ride her scooter etc.. Similarly for work: The one day I go to the office, the other day I work from home, the next day I work from a cafe. This keeps the rhythm going of getting the work done, but still allows myself some novelty :)
Thanks for reading my recap and leaving this comment, Michael!
1. When I read your comment or think about our night routine, I feel like “well, that’s not much. I/we should just indulge our kids.” But in the moment, I tend to overlook this haha.
2. Yeah, I also try to work at different places once in a while, especially when I want to think vs do or when I switch projects (design vs marketing). But sometimes, even this “variety” becomes a routine 🙃
Ah yes, regarding #2, some sort of rut will invariably creep in, I think. Sometimes I play with the thought: "What if I just could travel the world a bit more to liven things up?" But then i quickly realize that that also becomes tiring (and inefficient). So I guess constistency = boring!
Oh yeah I’ll be so tired traveling the world too haha