February recap: Make a little progress
How to get unstuck, annual goal progress, and 13 interesting links
Imagine you are at the base of a mountain. You are trying to figure out how to get to the top. But you can only see the next three to four steps ahead because of a fog. Most steps will be in the wrong direction, and you might have to often retrace your steps and climb back down.
What do you do?
Coinbase founder Brian Armstrong shared the above analogy about finding product-market fit but I think it applies to many aspects of life. His advice:
So you have to just take steps into the unknown. And when you take three steps, another three steps will be revealed ahead of you, and sometimes you’ll end up on some local maximum. You’ll have to retrace your steps or whatever, or you come to a cliff. But most people in life don’t take the steps into the fog, into the unknown, because it’s scary.
Being stuck is, to me, the most frustrating experience. I don’t know what to do, and every option seems bad. Even though I’m stationary and not moving forward, I feel like I’m moving backward—which feels even worse.
In February, whenever I felt stuck, which is pretty often when thinking about startup ideas, I forced myself to just take a step. Any step. Like Bill Ackman talked about making a little progress every day.
Just do something. Don’t overthink it.
Here is my journal entry for 11 February:
After a day of research, reading, and brainstorming, I still felt unsure about how to proceed with the evaluation and metrics tracking [for AI agents]. But I tried to do something anyway, and that helped.
I wasn’t sure if having a single score output using llm as a judge would work but I tried it anyway. It wasn’t great but at least I know how well a quick prompt [in ChatGPT] performs and I can likely squeeze a bit better performance with a more comprehensive prompt. I wasn’t sure how to display and track the metrics but I tried to build a dashboard anyway. It doesn’t look great but at least I have something to work on and edit. And it’s much easier to discuss this with SK once there is something visual to make my ideas concrete.
Just like writing, prompting with ChatGPT and coding can help me move forward. It might not be perfect but it gives me more information to decide how else to move. Action creates momentum.
Like Brian Armstrong said, action produces information. I learned what my ideas are missing; I could check whether my prototype is actually valuable or novel enough; and I practiced building along the way. I still don’t know what’s right but I am slowly creating a list of what’s likely wrong.
I have been coding a lot more lately. I was reminded that whenever I get stuck, it’s often because I tried to program a big part of the project all at once. Different parts of the code interact in complicated ways; I don’t understand how each of them work; and I can’t untangle them. It is only when I break the project down into smaller steps, start with something small, and then gradually build up from there that I overcome the hurdle.
If you are feeling a little stuck, try to do the smallest thing possible that you can come up with.
One tiny step won’t solve the problem immediately but it will create that bit of momentum that will liberate you from the rut. And if you are lucky, that momentum might bring you all the way to the solution. Even if it brings you only to the next rut, you can repeat this trick again and again.
At least, that’s why I have been trying to do.
How am I doing for my 2025 goals
I’m well on track for all of my goals, except for my business goal. But my business goal is at least, if not more than, 10 times harder than the other goals.
In March, I am maintaining my efforts for my other goals goals, eliminating more unnecessary commitments, and devoting more time and attention to building our startup.
Build a meaningful profitable business
We spent February mostly exploring our AI ideas and building multiple prototypes: AI assistants, evaluation dashboards, an AI wrapper builder, and a prompt optimization tool.
In How to make something great, Ryo Lu wrote:
We’re taught to focus early—choose what’s “important,” discard what’s peripheral. But at the genesis of a thing that might be great, strict focus is a ruse. The best solutions emerge after you’ve wandered through a landscape of problems, discovering hidden connections and rich intersections. Don’t erect premature fences around what the solution “should” be. Early constraints, imposed for neatness or efficiency, choke off the possibility of the truly sublime. The treasure lies in expansive searching, in stitching together a tapestry of interrelated issues. Later, once you’ve roamed far enough, clarity will guide you toward the right edges. Until then, let curiosity roam.
I feel we have explored quite a bit, and it’s time to commit to something and launch it. We have been narrowing down to the few ideas that we would use ourselves. I hope to share more in March’s recap.
When selecting ideas, an angle I have been using is this: I’m technically sacrificing time with my son to work on new ideas because Pebblely has been paying us and the idea exploration hasn’t. So, I ought to work on something I find truly valuable and meaningful. While this has brought some clarity, it does add a little extra stress when I feel stuck.
Bring my family on a vacation
We are just looking forward to our planned trip!
(I thought it might be worth mentioning that going on a vacation as a family alone isn’t enough to build a family’s relationship. But I’m better at tending to the day-to-day than doing something significant once in a while. Most people over-index on occasions like Valentine’s Day to treat their partners well when it matters as much to have dinners together, wash the dishes, and talk heart-to-heart. However, I sometimes go overboard and don’t do anything significant for years. This goal was a forcing function to help break that habit.)
Read at least 3 books on parenting
I continued to read The Daily Dad, Good Inside, and The Sovereign Child. Instead of rushing through them, I prefer to read them slowly because each time I read them, they remind me to work on being a good parent.
Here’s my favorite The Daily Dad entry of the month, which resonates with me as a writer and parent:
February 6
It Takes DisciplineIn the 1960s, the young poet Diane di Prima was at one of those legendary Beat parties that movies are made of. Everyone was there. There were drugs and ideas and romances. Jack Kerouac was there, holding court. And yet di Prima got up to leave and go home early.
Why? Because her babysitter was expecting her. All the other writers in the room judged her, silently laughed at her, believers in that line that the pram in the hall is the enemy of good art. Kerouac was not so silent about his disdain. “Unless you forget about your babysitter,” he said to her in front of everyone, “you’re never going to be a writer.”
Di Prima, a good parent, left anyway. As Julie Phillips writes in her fascinating book about creatives and parenting, The Baby on the Fire Escape, “She believed she wouldn’t have been a writer if she’d stayed. To write and come home in time, she argued, required ‘the same discipline throughout’: a practice of keeping her word.”
So often important and talented people use their work and their talent as an excuse to neglect their obligations as parents but di Prima was exactly right to see them both as a matter of discipline and commitment. The idea that anything (or anyone) is improved by neglecting one part of their life for another is nonsense. But the opposite is true—by keeping your word to yourself, to your children, you are strengthening an important muscle. By being disciplined and protective of your personal life, you are being protective and dedicated to your professional life.
Don’t let anyone tell you differently. Don’t let anyone judge you for that.
The Sovereign Child has been a thought-provoking read because Aaron Stupple argues against controlling screen time, food, and sleep time.
But parents thought the same about books when novels reached mass audiences in the 1700s and 1800s. Biographies of Abraham Lincoln describe his father’s anger at young Lincoln’s obsession with books, which his father perceived as causing laziness and sloth.
I find his arguments pretty convincing. For example, I don’t believe restricting my son’s screen time is the best thing for him in the long run. Technology will always be a part of his life and likely a much bigger part than it has been in my life. It is more important to teach him to have the discipline to know when to use it and when not to and the ability to discern between good and bad information and actors online. This parent went even further to condition her son that nothing on screens is particularly interesting or engaging. Without exposure to technology, one cannot learn to develop a healthy relationship with it. Even as an adult, I wasted many hours scrolling YouTube Shorts until I learned to manage this bad habit.
Write daily, publish monthly
Keeping up with my writing streak, I continued to write my daily journal and publish twice a week. My subscriber count has been falling rather than increasing, which is understandable because most of my subscribers signed up for marketing content but I mostly write about my life and AI now. I also often remind myself that I write for myself rather than for external validation.
But seeing the lower number every time I go to my Substack dashboard had caused me to doubt myself. I almost gave up writing last month. To get rid of the unnecessary influence, I developed a custom Chrome extension to hide the stats on my dashboard.
Eat healthily, exercise 5x/week, sleep well
I’m maintaining this goal well and even cycled twice in January. I’m finally becoming leaner and stronger.
But overall, I have felt more lethargic (but not as bad as the first year with my son). I had stopped taking my multivitamins and probiotics after finishing what I bought, and I wonder if that’s the reason. I don’t like the idea of depending on supplements, though, so I have been trying to eat more healthily to see if it helps. I also fell a little sick in February but I’m not sure if I was feeling lethargic because I was sick or because I stopped my supplements. Anyone in a similar situation?
My remaining goals
One-year goals (i.e. other 2025 goals)
Help my son develop a night routine and be in bed by 8 p.m. - He has been going to bed a little later at around 9 p.m. because we haven’t been as disciplined about the night routine.
Take three deep breaths whenever I’m angry or frustrated - I needed to do this less, which is a good sign. I tried to catch myself before I lost or as I was losing control of my emotions.
Accompany my parents and uncle to their health appointments - Two so far.
Cycle 10x a year - I cycled twice in February; two in total now.
Switch from kopi (coffee) to kopi siew dai (coffee less sweet) - I switched to latte, which has no sugar.
Host five dinners at home
Get a part-time cleaner for our house - We decided to step up our cleaning ourselves for now.
No coffee after 3 p.m. - Yep.
Five-year goals
Bring my family to Europe and New Zealand
Create a library at home for my son - I turned our unused TV console into a mini-library for now.
Teach my son to cycle and swim - He loves going to play in the pool, and we have been going at least once a week.
Learn to play the piano
Complete a triathlon (any distance)
Lifetime goals
Publish a book
Get back into drawing
Complete an Ironman triathlon
Bring my son somewhere to see snow (maybe Japan, Seoul, or Switzerland)
Raise kids with integrity, compassion, and agency
Build something with my dad
Have a workbench for playing with hardware (new!)
Visit Ghibli Park in Aichi, Japan, and Ghibli Museum in Tokyo, Japan
Mentor someone
Volunteer somewhere (maybe contribute to healthcare or education)
Contribute somehow to Singapore (maybe through my business)
Become rich enough to be independent, not to acquire material possessions
Live until 100 while being physically fit and mentally sharp
Use social media to help others, not just consume content
Learn to speak another language (maybe Japanese)
Links
[Life] Pure Independence - This is my favorite essay for the month. In it, Mougan Housel described the independence I have been striving for. While I only mentioned financial independence in my 2024 review, my goal is to also achieve independence in morals, thoughts, and culture, as he described in his essay.
Financial independence is a wonderful goal. But achieving it doesn’t necessarily mean you stop working – just that you choose the work you do, when you do it, for how long, and whom you do it with.
[Life] Why are we so tired all the time?
’s advice: Slow down and do fewer things, find a community or build one, and do art for art’s sake.[Parenting & Startup] Epitaph for an Entrepreneur (by
) - This article has helped me tremendously when I was struggling to balance it all after my son was born.[Parenting] Some cool parenting tools that Zack Klein uses with his 8 and 10
[Writing] Advice for a friend who wants to start a blog (by
)
Not that many people will care about what you write, at least for the first few years, so make the writing useful to you. Write in a way that lets you refine your thoughts about the things that matter. Write to experience what you care about in higher resolution—write to enhance your feeling of aliveness.
[Writing'] “the unnecessary use of complex language sent out a bad impression”
[Growth] How I Take Notes (by
)[Growth] School is Not Enough (on agency by
)[Design] Notes on “Taste” and Developing Taste - I also wrote about taste recently: To develop taste, first understand deeply
[Design] How to make something great
[Design & Psychology] On the value of operational transparency in product design
For example, the bright red Powerball in Finish dishwashing tablets, as well as the salient red centre of Anticol’s medicated throat lozenges, illustrates “this is the hardworking bit.” When we see these products there’s no question in our minds where the unique value or effort is. They’re practically radioactive. As Rory Sutherland writes in Alchemy, the same is true of striped toothpaste.’ Psychologically, the red, blue and white coloured stripes give us a clear signal that the toothpaste is performing more than one function, aiding the belief that this single toothpaste can offer the trifecta of strong teeth, fresh breath and …
[Marketing] IKEA Happy Halloween
